Flashing lights, cameras clicking and laughter filling the air on a Saturday night. Forced smiles, despising a date and hating how you look. That’s a pretty typical school dance night.
While dances are a chance for students to enjoy themselves and have a fun-filled day with their friends, many students face great stress when it comes to school dances. Mentally preparing themselves for a demanding night, students suck in their stomachs and find the perfect tight-fitting dress and the best photo location. The push toward perfection has created an ideal-seeking generation of students.
More specifically, dances create an oxymoron: students look their best, but their self-esteem is plummeting. The pressures are intense and burdening. Societal standards say that an individual should attend a dance with a date, and always post their photos on a social media platform. That alone generates tension in groups and dates. Each person is seeking out ways to appear flawless, due to the extrinsic motivations of social media, peers, and demands.
However, these naive made-up standards create assumptions that turn into chaotic anxiety, building into an unachievable external validation; so, what is a high school student to do?
With her second year attending homecoming, sophomore Sophia Foad has had some time to think about that question, and why she goes to dances. “I think going to school dances is more than just going for yourself”, stated Foad. “Students can be pressured into going by another friend or family member, or feeling the need to fit in by posting that they went.” Thus, the typical longing feeling to fit in is yet again another cause for self-inflicted hassle and strain.
Whether they go with a date or not, students will be ridiculed. The cycle of constantly questioning how good you look, what people think of you and the people you go with is a painful and burdening process.
Insecurities are exposed, leaving students feeling naked, despite wearing their fanciest clothes. Many students hide their timidness by posting smiling pictures on Instagram, leaving a flawless digital facade, masking the true self-doubt they have.
Freshman Jaylee Duncan attended her first homecoming dance a few weeks ago, and struggled, as many students her age do. “It’s hard when you try on a bunch of dresses and don’t like how any of them look on you,” said Duncan. “And then it’s also hard to think that you look good when everyone else looks better than you, and their eyes are still glued on you.” The comparisons grow, making dances a hard place to stay confident.
